I was kind of hesitant to share this part of my life with people. I prayed so hard about this prior to posting this article. But I have come to a realization that this story might be an inspiration to some and a lesson to many. Ladies, always remember that our God is bigger than our heart break.
“He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds” Psalm 147:3
I have been raised as a Born Again Christian since birth so I grew up as the modern day Maria Clara. As a kid I have always dreamt of having just one boyfriend my whole life. Modesty aside, I had lots of suitors. Some are long term ones but I was always scared of saying yes to commitment. Until I said yes to my first boyfriend last July 20, 2013. It took me a long time to adjust but during those times that I was with him, I was at my happiest. In my little world everything was perfect.
Two years later (4 days after our 2nd year anniversary to be exact) he cheated on me. My whole world crashed. I have never felt pain so severe I thought I wasn’t going to make it. It was so painful, I cried so hard, knelt down on my knees and prayed “Father, it’s too painful”. I had so many questions in mind. Lots of whys. Why me? Why now? I blamed myself. I blamed my career. I blamed my very being. Ladies, never ever blame yourself for the infidelity of your partners. You may have some short comings as a girlfriend yes! But that is never a valid reason for him to cheat. Amidst all the pain, one thing remained, Faith. I only had one thing in mind while I was going through all of this, Isaiah 66:9 “I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born.” I kept repeating that statement over and over and over again until the heart break is not as painful anymore. I’m not gonna say it was easy because it wasn’t. But we have a mighty God who has overcome the world. I declared “God is bigger than this pain” I kept my trust in God. So He fought the battle for me.
You see prior to my ex boyfriend cheating on me, I knew he wasn’t leading me where God wants me to be but I loved him too much to let him go. I couldn’t do it on my own so God had to intervene. Over time I have learned that my heart break is a blessing from God. It’s His way of letting me realize He is saving me for a better one, the right one. Sometimes God’s blessings are not in the things He gives, but in what He takes away. He knows what’s best for you and me, trust Him! When God takes something away from your grasp, He’s not punishing you but emptying your hand for you to receive something better. God has a reason for allowing people to walk out of our lives. Trust that He will replace them with someone better.
Miracles followed after my breakup. I have my own car. I learned how to drive. I joined the singles getaway of Victory and met a lot of people of the same faith. I auditioned and joined Music Ministry to serve God. Joined a fellowship that helped me recover and grow in faith. Started a journal of spiritual milestones and lastly I’ve had a much closer relationship with God. All of which I wouldn’t able to do if I have a boyfriend. Surprisingly, I was happier than ever. The happiness that I felt inside was so extreme; I can say it’s all worth the pain.
Of course since you’re soaring high with God, the enemy would always try to take you away by reminding you of the pain, reminding you that you’re alone and not loved. Reminding you that no one in this world will ever love you again. Ladies, you know better. When you hear these lies from the enemy, always go back to the word of God. Always be reminded of His promise that He will never leave us nor forsake us. That His plans are to prosper us and not to harm us. Nothing in this world will ever make God love you less. Only God can give you the love that you’re looking for. And only He can give you the person who loves Him enough to deserve you.